It's As If We Never Said Good-Bye

Once back in our room after GPS Love Fest, the feeling was somber.  The room was clean and for the first time in 4 days you could see the 4 inches of counter space we had.  For the last time, we all crawled into our tiny sleeping nooks and fell asleep to NKTV.  One of the perks of the cruise which is New Kids TV, 24/7.  I don't think we ever changed the channel.  We knew the order of the video clips and were able to recite them by now.  But as some asshole once said, all good things must come to an end.  On a side note, I wish I knew who that douche was because, wow, talk about a party pooper.  We slept, or napped for two hours, only to wake and be thrown back into our lives.

The cabin was silent due to either sadness or lack of sleep but no one was talking.  It was over.  The trip was over and the lingering effects go on for month.  As we were de-boarding the ship, we ran into the Jareds to thank them for all they did.  Putting this cruise together is no easy fete (in case I didn't mention it before, noses of a BH are strong and able to pick up any scent from miles away-- the FBI has nothing on us). So we sort of accidentally ended up in line for the elevator with the Jared's giving glowing reviews to the cruise and hoping, just hoping, word would travel back to Danny, Donnie, Jordan, Joe and Jon.

Once through security and customs, Sporty and I said our goodbyes to Baby.  We jumped in a shuttle van and headed to another airport.  The van was tight with other cruisers who bragged about their experiences....  fish tales I call them.  Trying to to make other jealous.  I popped in my ear buds, toned them out and listened to some old school hip hop while reminiscing about 90's night.

At the airport, we met DJ Cheapshot, who, by far is the sweetest man to walk to earth.  Doll.  Complete doll.  Sporty and I were sleep deprived and this is when we learned everything is funnier when you are bleary.... Case in point: Sporty and I were sitting at one of those charging stations at the airport.  The outlets were all filled.  By now, Sporty and I had sucked the battery dry on our phone ins the two hours that we had Internet access since we were off the boat.  We were charging iPods and IPhone with dozens of other people.  Sporty, who was yes, still suffering from sunstroke, had her head down over her folded arms.  I thought shew as asleep until some one's phone rang.....  It went something like this:

Dude on Phone: (in the loudest voice possible says) "This is Doug"
(and without skipping a beat) Sporty looks at me: "Is it black Doug?"

Was it funny? Probably not but to this day, it think it may be the best line ever since I described Donnie's scent as what I would imagine God would smell like.  After hours of sitting in the airport, it was finally time to board the plane which mean, simple, SLEEP.  Thank you Jesus (in my Melissa Gorga voice).  We found our seats, grabbed the nearest New Kid dad and prepared for our journey home.  although I was so tired I had tears streaming down my face, I still drugged up on my xanax and braced myself for the flight home.

I mentally clicked my heels together three times and the next thing I new, the plane had landed.  It was over.  My journey, my oaf, my solitude.....  was over.  Within moments of hitting the tarmac, I became a wife, a mother, a daughter and an employee all over again.  Sadness erupted from within until I realized one, truly important notion--- I get to do this shit all over again so....

DANNY, DONNIE, JORDAN, JOE AND JON---- ANNOUNCE THE FUCKING CRUISE ALREADY AND GET THIS PARTY STARTED!